IB Fortress

We need our own fortress. Inside the school, preferably. A series of procrastination and bullshitting tasks must be completed before entering the fortress – kind of like in Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone when, in order to get to the stone, one had to complete a series of tasks laid out by the Professors. Our fortress will be accessible only to those with IB-vision. Similar to X-RAY vision, IB-vision allows one to see through the BS of others while simultaneously protecting oneself with a shield of procrastination, protecting the IB student from any harmful homework, assignments, tests, essays, IAs, and exams until the night before said work is due. Our fortress will be magnificent – a wonderful place to go and actually get some work done and/or nap when class, as usual, becomes entirely useless. The fortress can even have invisible horse guards at the secret entrance to please those of us who like horses better than people. Also inside will be a smoothie bar, because smoothies are awesome. We will also have a water gun defence system to squirt any trespassers who are getting to close to our fortress’s walls. The fortress will also contain an endless supply of sour gummy worms and Black Blood of the Earth to keep our sugar and/or caffeine levels at their usual unhealthily high level.OH, AND A BOUNCY CASTLES. Everyone needs a bouncy castle.

Here is a picture of Chancey and Bob, who will be the guardians of the fort along with the invisible horses: